How about a nice Hawaiian punch?

For the Week of November 13, 2023
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If B&B is a roost, then Steffy came back to rule it, as she flexed her muscles by knocking Sheila into next week and picking a fight with Hope, who surprisingly gave as good as she got. But don't count out Li, who proved the idiom "sisters are doin' it for themselves" by nearly popping Poppy! Get the gloves on with Two Scoops' Mike!

Has your week been bold and beautiful? Were you ready to take your sister into the back alley? Were you good with having blood on your handkerchief as long as it wasn't on your hands? Did you forget that you've fought your greater enemy with greater weapons than you're using now? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer-Finnegan clan this week!

To the moon, Scoopers! It would appear that Steffy is back, and she upgraded her software while in Rome. Make that hardware, as the suddenly no-longer-afraid is-she-or-isn't-she-co-CEO seemed hardened in challenging Hope to verbal fisticuffs after treating Sheila to the real thing. Meanwhile, Li was ready to scrap with her sister, and Liam wanted a rematch with Steffy! Y'all ready? Let's Scoop about it!

First, let me backtrack and say how horribly disappointed I am that B&B threw away the opportunity to have Sheila and Lauren mix it up while Ms. Fenmore-Baldwin was in L.A. It makes zero sense that Lauren hasn't been told on-screen that her most feared nemesis is actually alive six years after Sheila showed up with her own face. I'd hoped we'd get a Lauren/Sheila scene...but deep down, I knew we wouldn't. Le suckage.

NOW SERVING KNUCKLE SANDWICHES

Apparently, Steffy used her time in Italy to clear her head, to hear her tell it, and that accounts for her being ready to rumble after she was so scared of Sheila that she couldn't handle one conversation with her. All right, I'll buy the transition. It's true that Steffy's rejuvenated badassery more accurately matches Steffy's attitude of yore. But Steffy pushing Sheila was kind of lame.

Don't forget, in 2017, Steffy was the one who burst into Sheila's motel room and popped a cap in her simply for reaching for an electric razor! Now, I don't advocate for guns in this mass shooting climate we're in, but you'd think Steffy would be keeping Gangsta Granny's gun superglued to her anytime she's within a hundred miles of Sheila.

Instead, Steffy pointed her weapon words at Deacon, finding it laughable that the hunky restauranteur was of the opinion that he could stop Sheila. Not that there's anything to stop Sheila from -- for all the hoopla, she's barely approached Finn at all and hasn't exactly been hanging around Hayes. After Steffy declared to Deacon that Sheila would only destroy him, Steffy tried to destroy Sheila's face...with her fist!

One could argue that Sheila wouldn't have shot Steffy in that alley if Steffy hadn't taunted Sheila so thoroughly. That's not at all to say that Steffy deserved it, but after that almost deadly altercation, it might be wiser for Steffy to not poke the same bear...at least not without Stephanie's gun in her purse. "That's what you get for shooting me and my husband," Steffy raged, justifying the punch.

Steffy was lucky Sheila seemed to be sticking to her three-thousandth "I'm not like that anymore" claim and declined to fight back. After all, Sheila is the woman who choked the crap out of Quinn just for calling her a bitch. There's not enough weight to Sheila's claim of change, but more on that later. For Steffy's part, she went home, hung out with Finn and the kids, and then had sexy time with Finn. No further explanation needed.

TALKING SMACK

Fired up from her wannabe victory over Sheila -- and Finn's phallus -- Steffy laced up her gloves when she found Hope and Thomas in Phase One of fornication. Thomas buckled up his pantaloons and got the hell out, advising his sister and lover not to kill each other. Steffy was determined not to let Hope undermine her brother, but found herself astounded when Hope and her sassy new haircut were uncharacteristically "meh" about it.

Steffy correctly noted that Hope's attitude had changed. Maybe Hope's slinky dress was the giveaway after years of what some of you call Hope's Little House on the Prairie garb. Hope announced that she was living life for herself and no longer by the expectations of everyone else. She wasn't the victim in the gondola anymore (well, cha-cha-cha! Nice nod to history!) and she wasn't concerned if Steffy didn't like Hope sexing Thomas, tough!

Certainly, Steffy wasn't expecting Hope to volley back with her own verbal salvos, but Steffy, who more often than not has a skewed take on anything Logan, wasn't exactly wrong here. Steffy accused Hope of abusing Thomas' feelings for her and using him as a sex toy. Dramatics aside, that's exactly what Hope is doing. Hope herself does everything she can to pivot when asked about her true feelings for Thomas.

That's because Hope doesn't have any. Steffy sensed it, saying Hope was reveling in Thomas' undivided attention to her. Steffy also didn't think Hope was over Liam, which, given the length of Lope's marriage and subsequent separation, has to hold true. And Steffy also feared that Hope's dalliance with Thomas would screw things up with Hope for the Future, since Hope and Thomas were inexplicably tied to it.

Hope pooh-poohed it all, even Steffy's contention that Hope was turning into her mother. Hope admitted having previously been terrified of comparisons to Slut from the Valley Brooke, but Hope was mellowing about it. The confrontation capped with the interesting twist of Hope and Steffy agreeing on the insanity of Deacon having any kind of relationship with Sheila. And speaking of insane relationships...

Well, Taylor had followed Steffy back from Rome, and immediately laid into former bestie-for-five-minutes Brooke about Hope bedding down with Thomas. Again, Taylor was all for that union when Thomas returned in 2019, but Taylor was still crazy then. When Brooke said that she was trying to stay out of the Thope sitch, Taylor laughed, saying, "That's a first!" Truly, just weeks ago, Brooke was working to get Hope to see the light about Thomas.

Taylor scoffed that Hope hadn't even filed the divorce papers. Wait a minute! Hope signed those -- it's Liam who's had them sitting in his car! And given how Steffy-centric Tofu Boy has been lately, it's surprising Liam hasn't FedExed the docs to divorce court by now. But the real jaw-dropper happened when Ridge joined the fray. He deemed Thomas and Hope grownups who could manage their own relationship.

Well, I guess when pretty much everybody in a family has been each other's partners and gotten with their partners' siblings, they can't be expected to look upon the romantic and sexual relationship of two people who have spent most of their time as stepsiblings as gross. Even Taylor, the "world-renowned shrink," says nothing about this when any novice therapist would label Thope unhealthy at best and aberrant at worst.

Just once, I'd like to hear one of these people get real and mention that the knots in Thomas' and Hope's family ties are simply too tight for them to get that tight with each other. Hope's in serious need of psychiatric help based just on that, let alone the fact that Thomas withheld the knowledge of Beth being alive from Hope and stalked her. That's a turn-on? Hope ain't right, this story ain't right, and I'm gonna keep sayin' it.

MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT

While we're on the subject of breaking off some cold, hard truth, Taylor made a beeline for Deacon's dinky pad to accost Sheila. Sidebar -- Deacon runs a successful Beverly Hills restaurant now and still lives in the teeny one-bedroom above it? Sidebar over. Taylor wasn't about Sheila's "I'm better now because I found love" gushing and warned Deacon not to believe in Sheila. After all, Taylor had once believed in Sheila, too.

Sheila jumped on the fact that she and Taylor had had a bond, but Taylor barked that doing things like shooting her daughter had a way of breaking bonds. Why does Taylor never bring up that Sheila shot her first? But I suppose Taylor made up for it by telling Sheila, "You are unhealed at the most fundamental levels of human condition...and you refuse to get help."

Isn't that exactly right? If Sheila were really serious about taking care of her loose screws, she'd be back in therapy. Those sessions made for some of the most interesting scenes when she sat for them from about 1994 to 1998. Shouldn't we finally know why Sheila is crazy? We know some things -- miscarrying Scott's baby on Y&R pushed her over the edge, and in 1996, she admitted to having been abused by her father.

But really, the only direction we can go with Sheila at this point is getting into what made her a sociopath. Just watching her make claims at redemption after doing a bunch of crazy crap isn't going to cut it. I guess there's one other direction -- Sheila could bite the dust permanently. Between Taylor's warning of reckoning, Steffy clocking Sheila, and Li pastafying Sheila, a murder mystery could be taking root.

SOCK IT TO ME

R.J. had boo-boo face because he had ratted Eric and his fatal diagnosis out to Ridge. But the young influencer soon made himself feel better by kissing Luna. These kids have never seen each other outside the confines of Forrester. How about going on an actual date instead of just macking on each other? Elsewhere, in the never-before-seen showroom the showdown took place in, Eric deferred going to the doctor in order to savor his victory.

Eric was happy to be reclaiming his office and his position. I don't get it. No one took those things away from him. When Ridge and Steffy became co-CEOs in 2017, Eric was busy with his marriage to Quinn and okay with his son and granddaughter running things. Eric entered said office and was surprised to see that Ridge had restored it to how it was when Eric ruled it.

Ridge apologized for chucking Eric's retcon stapler, and it was nice to see that Ridge had once again warmed to Eric following the showdown and the news of Eric's coming expiration. But Ridge was pissed with Donna for not telling him Eric was dying. Ridge, Donna, and Brooke hightailed it to Dr. Colby's office for answers. What time must it have been? This was long after the showdown and its aftermath!

Ridge was right that other doctors and specialists should be consulted instead of sticking Eric with a death sentence. Colby started to talk about Eric's "hemoptysis", which I was hoping would lead to a more distinct diagnosis. But I looked it up -- hemoptysis simply means coughing up blood. And it's usually related to lung cancer, pneumonia, and the like. SoI need answers!

Later, Ridge determined that no one else was to know that Eric was dying. Brooke assured him that she hadn't told Hope, nor Rick or Bridget, the latter of which was a nice touch. At least Brooke remembers her other kids exist. Another history-mining moment was Ridge acknowledging that both he and Brooke had lost their mothers. And it was sweet that Ridge admitted he wasn't ready for Eric to go.

THE HITS KEEP ON COMIN'

For whatever reason, Poppy left whatever she does in San Francisco behind and paid a visit to her daughter, Luna, at Forrester. I have to say, it's nice to have Asian characters on the show for a change. Poppy had been receiving demanding texts from Li ordering her to get Luna to quit Forrester, so Luna encouraged Poppy to stand up to Li, as she had. Well, Luna has to stay at Forrester. It's not like she lives anywhere.

Concurrently, Finn was telling Li he was having trouble understanding why Li was hating on Luna so hard. He got Li's beef with Poppy, but not what Luna had done. Li replied that she wasn't trying to punish Luna; it was just that she didn't trust Poppy. In fact, Li as much as intimated that she suspected Poppy of installing Luna at Forrester because Finn was married to a Forrester!

It didn't take long for Li to find Poppy at the design house and hit the sisterlode. Li wanted Luna out (again) and didn't want Luna or Poppy messing things up for Finn. Because, you know, Finn's wife was co-CEO. Wait a minute! Didn't Eric usurp both Steffy and Ridge by taking the full CEO position back for himself? I'm totally lost now about who does what at that place. But then, Brooke hasn't had a specified job there for years.

I hope we find out what Li's major damage is with Poppy soon and what exactly Li thinks Luna is going to do that will upset Finn's apple cart. You think Li would actually mellow out if she got with Bill, like she should have after he rescued her amnesiac self last year? Talk about a missed opportunity. Li is a shark, man. Imagine her and Bill raising hell together! Is Li even divorced from Jack? Bring him back for Taylor.

POUND THE ALARM

Speaking of Bill, his duty of the week was to listen to Liam whine about Steffy. Gee, no talk of where Wyatt disappeared to? Liam was sure he could provide Steffy with a better and safer life. News flash, Liam: Hayes is still Steffy's son. Liam's wrong that Deacon's involvement with Sheila will keep her around; Hayes will do that. And why the hand-wringing? Sheila hasn't done squat to be around Finn or Hayes in eons.

Liam decided he needed an ally in his quest to win Steffy back (never mind the divorce papers still sitting in his car) and decided that ally was Ridge. Liam felt he and Ridge needed to convince Steffy to leave Finn. Hey, Liam, remember when you left a pregnant Steffy crying on the sidewalk because she had slept with Bill? Don't act like everything was so great.

Undeterred, Liam went to see Steffy and asked her to "come back to sanity. To me." If Liam's constant yo-yoing between Steffy and Hope constitutes sanity, then I missed something. I'm usually not nearly as hard on Liam as most of you guys, but he really is being a "little puke" lately. He's not any better than Hope, running to someone else the second after a breakup. Besides...we've seen it all before!

What's your take on things, Scoopers? Should Steffy use more protective methods against Sheila? Should somebody point out to Hope and Thomas that their relationship would make Jerry Springer gag? Should we get more detail on what's killing Eric? Should Li delve into what's really freaking her out about Poppy and Luna? And should Liam take a breather from romantic pursuits already? Pop off in the Soap Central message boards, or simply click here to submit feedback!

My work here is done! Until we Scoop again in two weeks, keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold!

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