Something old, new, borrowed, and blue all rolled into one

For the Week of November 21, 2022
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Yet another wedding day inches forward, and Taylor has something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue -- Ridge! Don't do it, girl! Here are five reasons Taylor should put on her running shoes instead of her wedding gown. Plus, who else bets Douglas is ready for Liam to pick him up? The mansion ain't so fun anymore, is it? Let's scoop!

Do as I say, not as I do

Henri Samiri dominated the show in his role as Douglas Forrester when Douglas had to once again show his father who the mature person in the room was. Thomas told Douglas to stop tricking people with the Voice Changer app, and when Douglas started to comply with his father's demand to delete the app, guess what he found out? That his father had tricked people with the Voice Changer app!

It was a priceless "do as I say, not as I do" moment, and you should have seen the look on Thomas' face when he was busted for doing wrong yet again by a child. Apparently, sons know best, not fathers. To Douglas, it seemed a lot like the time Thomas was lying about baby Beth. Thomas tried to claim that Brooke had made the call from Douglas' phone. Douglas was like, "I'm not stupid. I know what you did. It was wrong. Period."

All the fun, fun, fun at great-grandpa's house came to a jaw-clicking halt as Thomas urged Douglas to stuff down his morals because his grandpa enjoys Taylor more than Brooke. Not only that, but Thomas also forced Douglas to attend the rehearsal dinner and to partake in the wedding ceremony, all the while knowing Douglas is opposed to the manipulations that brought about the occasions. Douglas' face is longer than a list of Ridge's failed marriages, and I wouldn't be surprised if Douglas calls Liam to say he's ready to go home.

Usually, when a kid hides something from a parent, it's something bad, but Douglas wound up hiding something good from Thomas -- the evidence of the truth about the Child Protective Services call. Why Thomas didn't delete it himself, I cannot tell you. For now, it's tucked under Douglas' pillow. Will any of the adults find it?

For all the attention the adults didn't pay to Douglas' feelings at the party, I doubt it. None of the adults appeared to get how tortured the child was. I guess that's what mommies are for. Hope would have instantly known something was wrong with her son, which is probably why the writers conveniently sent her out of town for the wedding.

Thomas is monstrous to put the weight of Ridge, Taylor, and Brooke's happiness on Douglas' shoulders. If he was a decent father, he'd tell the truth and unburden Douglas.

"Ridge isn't marrying you just because Brooke did something"

Ridge got a bright idea and proposed marriage to Taylor with what looked like a muslin mock-up dress he probably dug out of Thorne's old basement office. When Ridge flashed a spotlight on it, he reminded her of the time he'd proposed to her while she'd been in a wedding dress on the runway. Just like that, Ridge proved that he was once again following his same old patterns, and just like that, Taylor proved that she was still dumb enough to fall for it all.

Ever since hearing Brooke's fake voice on the CPS recording, Ridge has been more devastated than a devoted fan at Milli Vanilli's final concert. He finally told Taylor what was bothering him -- Brooke had done something! Ding! Ding! Ding! It's the very reason Taylor said she didn't want to be with Ridge, so why is she still standing up there, toasting to herself and Ridge?

Oh, because the alcoholic is drunk? Maybe, because Taylor can't be in her sober mind and still want to marry Ridge after hearing how passionate he felt about Brooke calling CPS. Ridge claimed it wasn't the reason he'd proposed. He said he loved Taylor, and he deserved a woman who'd be honest with him. Heck, he even told Thomas that people deserved to know the truth.

So, why hasn't Ridge been honest with Brooke? And why hasn't he been honest with Taylor or himself? If Taylor was honest with herself and found a sliver of a backbone, she'd put a halt to this whole fiasco. Taylor just needs more incentive to do the right thing. Here are five more reasons Taylor needs to cancel her trip to the altar.

Reason One: Ridge proposed to Taylor to run away from Brooke -- again! Often, when Ridge proposes marriage to Taylor, it's in reaction to something about Brooke. In fact, he made the 90's runway proposal with a dress and ring meant for Brooke. He made the "Man and Horse" marriage proposal after Brooke dumped him for having drugged sex with Taylor. He made the "Berry Island" marriage proposal after Thomas lied about having sex with Brooke. Taylor needs to do some serious flashbacking on all of Ridge's marriage proposals and run!

Reason Two: He's living with you, but his stuff is at Brooke's house. I don't think I need to elaborate more on this, do I? His cufflinks are over there. His underwear is probably still over there. I'll bet his nose-hair clippers and ear-wax removers are in her cabinet. Ridge is always gonna have one foot in Brooke's mansion and one in Taylor's beachside boom-boom bungalow, so Taylor should drop her Ridge pom-poms and run!

Reason Three: Taylor's kids keep telling her he's not marrying her because of what Brooke did. You know what that means? He's totally marrying her because of what Brooke did. Why won't her kids just be honest with her? We know why Thomas won't, but Steffy, the divorce and annulment expert, needs to head her mom off from disaster and tell her to run!

Reason Four: He went from married to annulled to engaged to groom in less than 24 hours. It must be a record for Ridge to transform from married to married this fast. Like Donna asked, shouldn't that be a red flag for Taylor? And Donna, the mistress, would know from experience. She and Eric never rebounded into a marriage that fast. Once, Ridge said he was marrying Taylor fast because he feared he'd change his mind. Taylor better recognize the sign and run!

Reason Five: Your groom is something old, new, borrowed, and blue rolled into one. The biggest reason that Taylor needs to stop this wedding is because Ridge has become her something old, new, borrowed, and blue all-in-one. I know a husband is supposed to be many things in one, but not these. This thing with Ridge is old, and it's tiring, even though Thorsten Kaye and Krista Allen being in the roles is something new. Ridge is a borrowed man, and because he's not with his Logan, he's completely blue. This always ends with Taylor jilted at the altar. She needs to just put on her sneakers and run!

One scoop shy of a full bowl

Below are a few things going on in Los Angeles that don't quite add up to me, so I'll detail them here and get your opinions.

Carter eavesdropping on Brooke and Bill. Carter played errand boy for the groom, but I'm pretty sure that's the best man's job. Anyway, Carter went to retrieve Ridge's cufflinks from Brooke's, and he got an earful of Bill once again making a play for Brooke. Why would what Carter heard be earth-shattering to anyone? Bill has been professing love for Brooke ever since the jet landed from Aspen. Katie knows it and claims to be over it, so what's the point?

And did Carter say he'd sneak into Brooke's house, and she'll never know he was there? Does he also know that her key is in the flowerpot? I know that he was merely picking up some cufflinks, but sneaking into a woman's house? I think this was a very tasteless detail for the writers, given that Andy sneaked into Brooke's house and raped her.

Steffy's lingerie dress. I mean, it was cute, but why the hell was she wearing it in front of her grandfather, father, brother, and nephew?

Speaking of lingerie...Why was Taylor downstairs in the living room, spinning around in her short nightie and see-through robe like an adult-rated Snow White? I know Zende is out of town, but Eric lives there, Douglas lives there, and Thomas lives there. And if it was all innocent, I'm still gonna need flighty Tinkerbell Taylor to stand down.

Douglas is more fly than the dressmaker. Douglas might be the next hottest fashion designer, and you can tell by how he dresses. He was debonair in his suit with his shoulder chain at the rehearsal dinner, and he showed up his Grandpa Ridge, who looked like he'd come home from a rough night as a lounge singer at a wrestling match. Is Ridge seriously intending to wear that big hand bandage to his wedding?

Don't tell the Logans. I would like to know how the CPS call secret can get out, and people actually complied with Thomas' nonsense about not telling Brooke. Steffy couldn't wait to "call Brooke out" but backed down at Thomas' command. Eric didn't mention it in pillow talk with Donna, and he didn't say anything to Katie at the office. Wouldn't you think Eric would be itching to ask Donna or Katie why Brooke had done something like that?

In a look ahead: Slow cruise to the wedding

This week, Patrick Duffy will reprise his role as Stephen Logan.

Carter blasts Bill after overhearing Bill's conversations with Brooke and then Katie. It sounds like Bill needs to start checking around to see who's listening in on him before he opens his mouth these days, and Carter ought to stop lurking in the shadows. Doesn't he have a wedding to officiate? Or does he?

Previews indicate that Taylor and her eighties prom gloves will make it down the aisle, but we might have to wait until after Thanksgiving to learn if Ridge and Taylor marry or if someone puts a stop to this trainwreck.

Thanks for reading. Please place your thoughts about the week in the comments section below. Have a bold and beautiful Thanksgiving, baby!

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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