All My Children Recaps: The week of October 17, 2005 on AMC

Kendall issued Erica an ultimatum. Mourners were shocked when Ryan reappeared. JR was reluctant to accept the truth about Di. Kendall turned her back on Zach after hearing his confession.
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All My Children Recaps: The week of October 17, 2005 on AMC
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the week of October 17, 2005
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Monday, October 17, 2005

Tad wants Di to tell everyone the truth that she is not Dixie. Di is reluctant. She asks him how he can for her to hurt those she loves. Tad feels that if she really loves everyone as she claims, then she would them to know the truth. Di does her best to persuade Tad to reconsider but he remains steadfast in his determination that the truth is revealed about whom Di really is. He explains that he refuses to lie to his loved ones in order to preserve her charade. Tad then warns her that if she doesn't tell everyone that she isn't Dixie then he will do it for her. He tells her that, with luck, some day they'll forgive her for what she did to them. Di asks Tad if he'll forgive her too. Tad avoids answering her question directly. Instead he assures her that if JR and Jamie forgive her he will not try to turn the boys against her. Di is uncertain whether she can find the strength to tell everyone how she deceived them. She asks Tad how she should tell them, what should she say? Realizing the enormity of the task ahead of her and the ramifications, Di tearfully tells Tad that she can't tell anyone the truth. Tad has little compassion for Di's predicament. He accuses her of being a thief and a liar for stealing Dixie's life and allowing everyone to believe she was Dixie.

Inside, JR and Jamie reminisce about their childhood as they share a few happy memories. Things become tense though when JR asks Jamie why he and Babe split up. Jamie wants to know why JR is curious about it. JR tries to explain that he's curious because of Aunt Phoebe's will but Jamie doesn't believe him. He points out that JR wanted Babe and Jamie apart long before the terms of Aunt Phoebe's will were an issue. Jamie then speculates if JR's curiosity is because JR has feelings for Babe. JR is quick to deny that he feels anything but animosity toward her. Things quickly deteriorate as both bring up past sins, JR pointing out that Jamie allowed his brother to believe that little Adam had drowned and Jamie bringing up the time that JR nearly killed him by bashing in his head. JR tells Jamie that at least Babe has tried to apologize for what she did to him but Jamie never has. Jamie defends his actions, saying he did what he thought was best for the baby at the time. Amid the bitterness and animosity, Jamie does concede that if JR were ever to resemble the brother he grew up with and loved, he'd readily apologize to him. They part on civil terms after both are able to agree that they are happy to see Tad and Dixie together.

When Jamie steps out to the back porch to ask Tad to move his car so that Jamie can head over to Ryan's memorial service, Tad takes the opportunity to warn Di one more time. Either she tells JR the truth while he is gone or Tad will when he returns from Ryan's memorial service. After Tad leaves, Di walks into the house. JR immediately senses that something is upsetting Di.

Erica is convinced that Kendall and Greenlee were manipulated by Dr. Madden into going through with the surrogacy pregnancy so that he can further his career. Kendall and Greenlee dismiss Erica's theory. They explain that with or without Dr. Madden's help, they would have gone through with the pregnancy. Kendall tries to make her mother understand that she agreed to be Greenlee's surrogate because she truly feels that the best way to honor Ryan's memory is to help Greenlee have their child. Kendall goes on to remind Erica that it's her body and her choice. She expects Erica to support her decision. Erica understands their motivation and she assures Kendall that she will do everything that she can to support Kendall but she still feels that Dr. Madden's actions were unethical. Greenlee decides that under the circumstances, maybe it would be best if Erica did not attend Ryan's memorial service. Erica is taken aback. She explains that she has every intention of attending, if for no other reason than for Ryan's sake. She does agree, after much prodding and cajoling on Kendall's part, to drop her quest to discredit Dr. Madden. Greenlee, isn't satisfied with Erica's concession. She tells Erica that if she cannot be happy about this pregnancy then she is not welcomed at the memorial service. After Kendall and Greenlee leave, Erica calls her assistant, Val, into her office. She asks him if there is any news from Tad. She is disappointed when Val tells her no. Before Val leaves, she reminds him that she expects him to keep her investigation into Greg Madden's past confidential and to make certain neither Kendall nor Greenlee learn of it. Val assures her that he will do everything in his power to make sure everything is kept secret.

Lily asks Jack why he's glad. Jack explains that he's not glad Ryan is dead but he felt that Ryan was not good for Greenlee. Jack goes on to tell Lily that he thought Ryan hurt Greenlee deeply and that as a father he could not stand by and condone it. He will always do what he feels is necessary in order to protect his children. Satisfied with their talk, Lily gets ready for the memorial service. Erica arrives home shortly afterwards to do the same. Jack senses her distraction but doesn't pursue it as he talks about the benefits of the memorial service. He sees it as an opportunity for Greenlee to say goodbye to both Ryan and the baby and move forward with her life. Erica bites her tongue when Jack comments on how surprised he is at the close bond that Kendall and Greenlee have formed recently.

Ryan returns home and walks through the apartment he shared with Greenlee. He is shocked by what he discovers in the bedroom. It's a wall of photos mostly of him and some of him and Greenlee as well as some of his more meaningful memorabilia. He seems to realize just how much Greenlee is grieving for him.

Greenlee and Kendall arrive home discussing their recent visit with Erica. Both are convinced that Erica is still planning on doing something that will in some way disrupt their lives. Suddenly, Greenlee stops and looks around. She immediately senses that someone was in her apartment while she was gone. When Greenlee cries out from her bedroom, "Oh my God!", Kendall rushes in to see what's wrong. Looking around Kendall doesn't see anything out of the ordinary other than the wall of pictures. Greenlee points to the bed, specifically the pillows which were not as they were when she left. Kendall suggests that maybe the made moved them but Greenlee dismisses the suggestion, telling Kendall that the Greenlee has instructions to stay out of the bedroom. Kendall doesn't pursue it. She is more concerned about the wall of pictures and what it may indicate. She gently asks Greenlee about it. Greenlee doesn't see anything wrong with it. She explains that the pictures give her comfort at night when she looks at them. Kendall is understanding but feels that she should take them down to make room for the pictures of the baby that will soon come along. Kendall is worried that Greenlee is going to be stuck in her grief over Ryan and won't be open to meeting anyone new. Greenlee has no interest in falling in love. She tells Kendall that her life will be centered around being a mother to her child. Kendall drops the matter so that they can get ready for the memorial service. Later, Greenlee admits that she doesn't think she's ready yet to say goodbye to Ryan. Kendall reminds Greenlee that she has both Kendall and the baby to help her. Just then Simone arrives to pick them up. She becomes distracted by the wall of photos of Ryan. Kendall gently ushers Simone out of the room to give Greenlee a moment alone. Alone, Greenlee takes a lingering look at the photos of Ryan.

Lily realizes at the last minute that she forgot to finish typing up her speech for Ryan's service. She sends Jack, Erica and Reggie on ahead to the memorial, promising to join them shortly. As Lily types on her laptop there is a knock at the door. Lily answers the door and finds Ryan standing in the hallway. She is initially uncomfortable, thinking he's a ghost. Ryan explains that he's very much alive and asks to come into the apartment. Lily allows him entrance. Ryan asks to speak to Jack, explaining that he can't walk around town risking running into Greenlee and giving her a shock. He feels that it would be best if Jack broke the news about Ryan being alive to Greenlee. Ryan then asks Lily if he knows where Greenlee is. Lily tells him that she knows exactly where she is.

Everyone gathers in the park for Ryan's memorial. Greenlee becomes agitated when she sees Erica arrive with Jack. She immediately confronts her, reminding Erica that she is not welcomed at the memorial. Jack is surprised and demands an explanation for what is going on. Angry, Greenlee turns to Jack and warns him that he won't like what she has to say. She asks one thing that after he hears what she has to say that he take Erica with him when he storms off.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Babe stopped Di from telling JR the truth and reminded JR he should be at the funeral for Kendall's sake. As soon as JR was gone, Babe looked Di in the eyes and told her she couldn't tell him that she wasn't Dixie. At first Di denied she was a fake, but eventually came clean. Krystal joined the party and also urged Di not to tell anyone who she was. Di busted their bubble when she announced Tad already knew and was demanding she tell the rest of the family. "I'm going to go smack some sense into Thaddeus Martin," Krystal announced and headed out the door. When she found Tad at the park, she begged him to let Di be Dixie.

In Canada, Jonathan and Erin discussed Greenlee and the possibility that Pine Valley might not be forgiving. "Will Greenlee forgive Ryan?" Jonathan wondered. Erin wasn't sure, but she was hopeful.

It took longer than he wanted, but Ryan pulled Greenlee's location out of Lily and jetted off to the park. When Lily put the final touches on her speech (it had to be changed since Ryan was now, you know, alive), she headed out, too. Meanwhile, at the park, Zach and Kendall were wisely able to talk Greenlee out of telling Jack about the baby. JR arrived just in time to hold Kendall's hand before the ceremony started. Greenlee made a poignant speech, but it was interrupted by Lily who wondered where Ryan was.

A few yards away, Zach had spotted Ryan and was pleading with him not to reveal himself for Greenlee's sake. Ryan was doing this for Greenlee, though, and there was no talking him out of it. He walked into his own memorial service and Greenlee, as well as all the other Pine Valley-ites, were stunned. (They must not watch soaps, because seriously, how many times has a character returned from the dead just in time to be a guest at their on funeral?!) And then, of course, Greenlee fainted in her not-so-dead husband's arms. When Erica asked Ryan to tell them how he survived and where he had been, everyone else chimed in, wondering themselves. Ryan promised he'd tell them all everything, but it would have to wait. He needed to be alone with Greenlee right now. So he did just that and took his wife home. "I have to tell you everything," he began, but she silenced him with a kiss.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Amanda goes to the bank to get a cash advance of $500.00. Alfred refuses to help her, noting that the name on the card that she handed him is James Martin, not Amanda Dillon. Babe happens along at that moment. Amanda explains that Jamie gave her permission to make the withdrawal but neither Babe nor Alfred believe her claims. When Babe suggests that Alfred call Jamie, Alfred told her that he already planned on doing so. Amanda becomes indignant and demands that he return the card to her but Alfred refuses. While Alfred steps away, Babe takes the opportunity to talk Amanda. She accuses Amanda of using Jamie and warns her that Jamie is going to eventually realize it. Amanda denies the accusation and makes her own, claiming that Babe is jealous. Amanda makes another attempt to get the card back from Alfred just as Jamie arrives at the bank and demands to know what's going on. Babe is a bit overconfident in her belief that Jamie will be very upset with Amanda when he realizes what she was trying to do. To Babe's surprise, Jamie listens as Amanda explains that she was merely trying to borrow $500.00 which she fully intended to pay back and Jamie authorizes Alfred to go ahead with the transaction. Incredulous, Babe asks Jamie how he could let Amanda use him in such a shameless manner. Jamie counters, asking Babe why she thinks it's any of her business. After Babe leaves, Amanda thanks Jamie and starts putting down Babe. Jamie puts an end to Amanda's rant by suggesting to her that the next time she needs money she asks him for the money instead of trying to steal it.

David pays Di a visit after Ryan's eventful memorial service. They argue back and forth with David taking particular joy in tormenting Di her tentative future as Di. JR walks up at the tail end of their argument. Not happy with the way David is talking to his mother, JR pulls David away and warns him to stay away from her. After David leaves, JR asks Di what their confrontation was about. Di brushes it off as David just being David. She immediately changes the topic to ask him about Ryan showing up at his own memorial service. They discuss the events for a few minutes and then JR leaves the room. Once she is assured that she is alone, Di places a call to someone. She asks to see the person on the other end immediately.

Krystal tires to convince Tad to keep Di's lie going for the sake of their children and grandchild. Tad isn't open to the suggestion. He tells Krystal that in his eyes, Di is nothing but a liar and a thief and everyone is entitled to the truth. Krystal doesn't agree. She points out how much Di as Dixie has helped the family mend including Tad. Krystal is convinced that Tad is in love with Di. Tad corrects her. He tells her that he was in love with Dixie, not Di. Krystal tries once again to point out the benefits to their family if everyone continues to believe that Di is Dixie but Tad isn't swayed. He walks way without giving Krystal the answer she wants to hear.

Jack is not happy with Ryan's return and how it may affect Greenlee's life. Erica sees it as nothing short of a miracle and tries to convince Jack to do the same but Jack simply can't. He is worried that Ryan is still the same man he was just before he went over the cliff. Jack can't forget the images he saw on the hotel tape when Ryan lost his temper. Erica feels that Ryan has changed. She noticed a difference in his eyes and feels it indicates that his rage is gone. Erica cautions Jack to back off or he will risk alienating Greenlee.

A furious Erica confronts Zach and doesn't mince words as lets him know that she holds him responsible for the complicated situation Kendall now finds herself in. Erica feels that as her husband, Zach should have convinced Kendall to not go through with being Greenlee's surrogate. Zach points out that Kendall has a mind of her own and no one can talk her out of something that she's determined to do.

Jack confides to Brooke that he's not at all happy that Ryan has returned to Pine Valley and Greenlee's life.

Kendall senses that something isn't right with Ryan's return. She enlists a reluctant JR to help her find out what happened after Ryan went over to the cliff. JR leaves to go home, promising to call Kendall with any information he finds. After JR leaves, Kendall questions Lily about the night she claimed to have seen Ryan's ghost. Lily tells her about seeing Ryan and then Zach coming along and telling Lily that Ryan was a ghost. Kendall realizes that Zach knew Ryan was alive all along. Erica walks up when Kendall is alone to check to see how she is handling everything now that it's been revealed that Ryan is alive. Kendall assures her mother that she is fine but she asks her to not say anything to anyone about her being pregnant. Kendall makes it clear that when the time is right, she and Greenlee will tell Ryan about the pregnancy. Erica understands and offers to take Kendall home. Zach approaches them at that moment and insists on being the one to escort his wife home. Kendall assures her mother that she's fine and would prefer to go home with Zach.

After Kendall and Zach leave, Erica walks up to Jack. He senses that she's is keeping something from him and demands to know what it is especially if it concerns Greenlee. Erica agrees that he has a right to know and proceeds to tell him that after Greenlee's miscarriage, Erica discovered that Greenlee was looking into other means of having Ryan's child. Jack is upset over the news. He feels it would be a horrible mistake. Erica agrees but warns Jack that Greenlee is a grown woman and will never see things as he does when it comes to Ryan and their child.

Greenlee and Ryan return to their home. Ryan tries to tell Greenlee everything that has transpired since going over the cliff but Greenlee isn't ready to hear it. She tells him that she can see he's no longer filled with rage by looking into his eyes. Instead of talking about what happened since he drove off the cliff, Greenlee insists on saving the talking for later and just savor being together. Ryan and Greenlee hold each other tightly and then exchange words of love before Ryan picks her up in his arms and carries her to the bedroom where they make love. Afterwards, Ryan reaches into his pants and hands Greenlee a gift. It's an empty butterfly cocoon that he found in the woods while he was gone. It represented how he felt. Ryan tells Greenlee that she, a beautiful butterfly, rescued him. He considers it a symbol of their new beginning. Greenlee then asks Ryan to tell her what he wanted to tell her earlier before she stopped him.

Kendall and Zach arrive back at her place. Kendall tries to get Zach to admit his role in Ryan's "death" but Zach misunderstands her. Instead, Zach promises Kendall that he will do everything in his power to make sure that she is safe in the event that Ryan doesn't take the news of her pregnancy well. Kendall is somewhat surprised, sensing Zach's sincerity. She is further surprised when Zach begins to tenderly rub her feet in an effort to get her to relax. Later, Kendall decides to confront Zach directly about his role in Ryan's "death." She tells him that she knows he lied and that he knew that Ryan was alive the whole time.

When Tad arrives at the Chandler mansion, Di escorts him into the living room where the entire family is gathered.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

All of the people from "Dixie's Welcome Home Party" plus a few others gather once more in the living room of the Chandler Mansion. At first, they all stare at Di, who remains at the entranceway, whispering to Tad. After a few snide remarks from Adam, the ball starts rolling. Di steps forward and says that all of the love they gave her as they welcomed her back into their lives and their hearts was undeserved. She notes that while she never meant to hurt any of them (because truthfully, she felt the family - and its value - was bigger than any lie), she knows now that she must confess her misdeeds. She admits that she wanted so much for her lie to be true - because being there, in the lie, filled their hearts with love that had been missing for 3 years. Finally, after much hemming and hawing, she admits that she's not Dixie - but rather her half-sister. Adam immediately jumps all over her case, announcing that he knew from the moment she showed up that she was a fake. He tries to continue the tirade, but his new bride cuts him off, noting how tactless he is. They all are informed that no one knew that a half-sister existed, which is why it wasn't taken into consideration during the DNA test. While most of the crowd stands in shocked silence, a tearful JR begs Di for a reason, any reason, why she would do something so horrible. Di tells him that because things changed, she had no choice. She tells them that she needed to be a part of the family, and that the amazing thing was that it turned out they needed her too. JR, unwilling to believe that he has now lost his mother for a second time, tries to blame it on his father.

Adam starts pointing fingers at Krystal and Babe, noting their lack of reaction, and surmises that they knew all along since Krystal and Di were jail mates. Before he can berate them any further, Di steps in and reminds him that both Krystal and Babe came to him with the truth a long time ago. It got Krystal out of jail and landed Di in the middle of a DNA test. At the time, she crossed her fingers and hoped that she had enough DNA to match Dixie. Joe notes that when the options presented were Dixie or a complete stranger, they had no choice but to conclude she was a match. Del comes in, and hearing snippets of the conversation, realizes that Di had, or was about to confess. He tries to snatch the confession back, but Tad threatens to make him pay if he goes any farther with his attempt. Di says that her home was originally Crow Hollow, but because she was the last in a long line of mouths to be fed and bodies to be clothed, she was given away to her aunt, Louise Kirby, who then raised Di as her own. Di didn't know anything different until she met Del. She fills them in on the one conversation she had with Dixie while Dixie was in Europe - after they found out about each other. The warmth in Dixie's voice when she spoke about her family was something unlike anything that Di had ever heard before. All of her words sink in and then Jamie confirms that not only has she been lying - but Dixie didn't survive. After the reality becomes a little more solid, Tad explains that while he wasn't investigating her, Di told him the truth via a letter that was only to be opened in the event of her death. Brooke points out that Di's confession then was not noble, but done because she got caught. Di tries to explain that the feelings that she experienced trying to do what she felt Dixie would want (such as healing the rift between Jamie and JR, and providing another person that Little A could count on), but the anger in the room builds until she dares to utter the words "I wish I were Dixie." The dam breaks and Opal hauls off and slaps her across the face. The onslaught of insults, accusations and threats begins, building to a frenzy of incomprehensible din. JR, unable to take any more, yells for all of them to stop. Still clinging to the belief that Di is really his mother, he begs her to tell everyone that she made it up. He thinks that she is lying about who she is now to hide from the criminals associated with The Dragon. He promises to keep her safe, but all of his pleading simply makes her cry harder. She tells him that she can't bear to confess her sins again. Jamie tries to convince his brother that Di is not worth pleading. Hurt, angry and confused, JR proclaims that he doesn't really know ANYONE in the room and runs out to the patio.

Within moments, Tad goes after him. He tells JR that no one loved Dixie more than the two of them, and no one grieved harder for her when she died. In addition, they were the ones that gained the most when they thought she had returned to them. JR, still grappling with the emotions that raged within, tries to blame everything on Tad: perhaps he was in on some plan with Adam or David, and that's why the woman in the Chandler living room turned her back on him. Tad tells his stepson that Dixie would never do anything like that, and that he felt obligated to make sure that JR knew the truth. Eventually, Tad and JR could have gotten their relationship back to where it used to be but Tad didn't want to rebuild it on a lie. Grief spilling over, JR insists that Tad never tells him the truth but his protests are weak in the face of his tears. Tad catches JR as he finally collapses, and apologizes that the truth is breaking his heart.

Back inside, as everyone stares at Di, she admits that she was wrong.

Kendall continues to blast her husband for leaving her unprotected when the bombshell of Ryan's survival hit. She notes that while Greenlee may be hearing the whole truth from Ryan at this moment, she needs to know if Zach intentionally kept her in the dark. Zach tells his wife that he lied, and surprisingly - she says that she's honored...that he decided to tell her the truth without being forced. She tries to make him feel badly for what he chose to do, but Zach doesn't cave. He tells Kendall that he found Ryan at the bottom of a cliff, both of them surprised at his survival. While it wasn't Zach's idea to stay dead, Zach did support Ryan's choice and helped him stay that way. He admits that he was afraid that the next time Ryan decided to raise a hand to Kendall or Greenlee, he wouldn't be there to stop it from happening. Kendall mentally revisits the day that Ryan told her he would go off a cliff before he would hurt Greenlee. She admits that she identifies with that kind of despair - it's the same feeling she had when she thought that she shot Ryan, and she chose to walk into the ocean. None of that, however, explains why Zach lied to her. He tells her that he did it to save her. Enraged, Kendall wants to know how he dared to think it was his place to save her from a man that she loved way more than she ever liked Zach. Zach reminds her that while she talks about the look in Ryan's eyes when he was afraid that he would hurt Greenlee, she never talks about the look they held when he was at Fight Club...or when he destroyed the suite at Zach's hotel. The problem, he notes, is that she and Greenlee only remembered the good parts about Ryan after he was gone. Zach knew, however, that Ryan was a monster that needed to be stopped - words that Ryan used to describe himself. Zach further notes that he was glad Ryan was gone - because he wasn't going to let Ryan hurt Kendall anymore. Kendall asked how he could watch Greenlee needlessly grieve and suffer. Zach tells her that Greenlee was suffering for a long time before Ryan left: because he chose to believe his psychotic brother over her, and because she believed she was the only person in the world that could save him. Kendall thought that the baby could have saved him, but Zach interjects with a question: did she think that Zach knowing his own son made him a better man? With no answer to offer, Zach tells her that Ryan didn't trust himself to be around Greenlee - and he agreed. Zach wants to keep Greenlee, Kendall and the baby that she is carrying safe from Ryan. Kendall is appalled that with a few simple words, Zach could have chosen to end both her and Greenlee's suffering - but chose not to. Zach told her that Ryan wanted to stay dead. She asked if Zach hid him out in the shed, and Zach confesses that Ryan was in Nova Scotia with his sister. It dawns on her that Ryan's location was the reason Zach freaked out when Greenlee announced where she went. Kendall thinks the reaction was because Zach was afraid of being found out. Zach tells her that his role in Ryan's "death" being unearthed was inconsequential to him. The thing he is concerned about is what Ryan's return will do to her and Greenlee. Kendall needlessly reminds him again that she is carrying Ryan's child - and wants to know how Zach could have let her surrogacy continue, knowing what he knew. Zach tells her that he wasn't wrong for the choices he made - so Kendall demands that he tell her what comes next. Zach admits that he doesn't know - and Kendall is flabbergasted that he let her see that flaw. He tells her that he tried to stop her, but she doesn't believe him. She asks him to explain his attempts. Zach informs her that it was too late by the time he tried, so he opted to stand behind her as she chose to stand behind Greenlee when she was pregnant. Kendall swears that she did that out of love, and questions whether Zach actually gives a damn about her. She reminds him that because he kept quiet, all he gave to her, and to Greenlee, was misery and sorrow. Zach then runs through a scenario of how their lives would have gone if he had told the truth. He tells her that misery and sorrow is nothing compared to what's coming next. Zach then repeats his promise to stand by her and protect her. He asks Kendall if she will let him make it up to her.

After making love, Ryan is bound and determined to tell Greenlee the truth behind his disappearance from Pine Valley. She drinks in the look on his face and states that she changed her mind - she doesn't want to know right now because it's not that important. She turns her back to him and wraps herself in his arms, but this does nothing to deter Ryan. He tells her that while he loves her with everything that is in him, he hasn't always loved her the right way. While he was gone, he didn't lack the presence of mind to know who he was or how to get in touch. He tells her that in the end, he didn't believe in the perfection that they had as a couple, so he drove his bike off the cliff as a way to get as far away from her as he could - so that she would be safe. When he opened his eyes and realized he had survived the fall, he felt that Death had cheated him. He knew she wouldn't be safe with him, so it was then that he decided to lie. After seeing the scene in the suite repeated in his head, where he had his fist raised to his wife's face, he knew he had to make a choice. He admits that at the bottom of the cliff, very much alive, he chose not to go back to Greenlee. He tells her that he went over the cliff on purpose, to save her, to give her the life that she deserved - one that he was certain he would rob her of had he stayed. While Greenlee tries to cling to the idea that Ryan's survival was a miracle, he dismantles it little by little. He tells her that he believed that she couldn't be happy with him the way that he was. Therefore, when he came out of the water, he decided to give her a life back by taking away his. He was sure that the tears would stop, that she would laugh again - especially with the new life she had growing inside her. Greenlee brokenly tries to tell him that she lost the baby, but he tells her that he already knows. Stunned, Greenlee asks how he could know. He tells her that she told him - that he was hiding at Erin's house when Greenlee went up to Nova Scotia. She begs him to tell her how she could be so close to him and yet he wouldn't reveal that he was alive. Before he can answer, she asks if her losing the baby is the reason he came back. He tells her that he heard the pain that she carried when she talked to Erin about their child, and knew that she would remain in a limbo because he was gone. He admits that he came back because he wanted to help her back from that pain. Resentfully, she then tells him that she can never carry a child to term, and that it would have been good if they had known that before he rode his bike off the cliff. Ryan reaches out to try to comfort Greenlee, but once the bitterness crept back in, the anger quickly followed. She tears pictures from her shrine to him off the wall, and clears the frames arranged on the table off with one fell swoop. Before she can affect any more damage, Ryan manages to grab her in a vice-like hug. She breaks out of it and demands that he never touch her again. Ryan insists that he has more to tell her, things that will explain what happened while he was away in Canada and why he changed. Greenlee, in her anger, dares him to try to explain. He tells her that he found the answers he needed in Canada - and he knew that she was right: the anger was not a part of him, he wasn't like his father. Greenlee is shocked that he could stand there and tell her that she was right, when the entire time he was away, she was dying inside for him. He swears that he did it to protect her, but she reminds him that by leaving - he ripped her heart out. She tells him that she can't believe he expects her to forgive him when her word, her belief in him, in their love, wasn't enough to keep him with her. He took her choice away - again, and she lets on that he will feel the full brunt of her fury. Ryan, humbled by her ire, apologizes and says he was wrong. Ryan tries to explain again why he made the choices that he did, and reveals that he has hope they can be together again. He also admits that he wants to give her back the choice that he stole from her...and that if she chooses not to be with him again, so be it. He begs her to let him try to make it up to her.

Thursday, October 21, 2005

JR weeps in Tads arms, but pulls away when he finally realizes his mother is dead. Di comes out and asks for a moment alone with JR. Tad goes inside to check on Jamie, while Di looks at the tear-stained face of her nephew. She tries to convey to JR that she wanted to give him back his mother to help him, not hurt him. Di claims to love him as if he were her own son, but understands if he wants to forget her name or her face. When she asks him to let her fix the mistake she has made, JR does not even begin to comprehend forgiveness. He starts naming off some of the things he has done for revenge. JR grabs her by the shoulders, telling her that she killed his mother all over again, and yells her to get out of his home. Di says that JR can hate her, but don't let it destroy all of the goodness he has in his heart. JR says she is never allowed near Little Adam again and is as dead to him as his mother. When Tad steps in, JR tells him to get her out of his house before he returns and walks out. Devastated by JR's reaction, Di seeks help from Tad to figure out how to remove all the pain she has caused. He tells her to leave, as JR asked, if she wants to start to make things better. Tad tells Di that she has no idea of the pain she has caused and not enough "Sorry's" can cut it. Di tells Tad that she will get her belongings and go, but asks Tad to try to save JR.

Once inside, Tad checks on Jamie, who seems to be taking the news of Di's betrayal pretty well. Krystal sneaks up and asks Tad if he is happy now that the cat is out of the bag. Adam eagerly calls his lawyer to start a civil suit against Di, but Tad warns Adam that JR is the one who will decide Di's fate. In the meantime, Adam pours himself a drink and offers another to Krystal. He toasts to their success of exposing Di for who she really is. Krystal tosses the drink in Adam's face and reminds him that his son is grieving all over again for his mother. Adam claims that JR has him to lean on, but he is more concerned about celebrating a victory. Krystal tells Adam that Di seems sorry for what she has done and is in fact family. Adam ignores those two thoughts and claims that Di should go back to prison and rot. Adam claims that Krystal is more concerned about Tad's feelings that JR's. He even says that she could go and try to romance the man while he is aching for Dixie. Krystal sees what Adam is hinting at and tells him that Tad is not in her future-however, a permanent marriage to him is. Krystal plans to stay with him to make sure that he does not mess up Little Adam's life like he has with JR.

Zach still wants to stand by Kendall, despite whatever reaction Ryan has to the news of her pregnancy. Kendall tells Zach that she will not forgive him for all the lies he has told her over and over again. He let her watch Greenlee mourn Ryan and help create a child for a man who was supposed to be dead, Kendall screams. Zach tells her that he does not care if she forgives him or not because they both have duties. He needs to protect Kendall, while wants to create an enemy when she doesn't need to -Jackson, Erica and Ryan who are not thrilled about the idea of her pregnancy. As Kendall starts rattling off insults at him, Zach breaks in and admits that he cares about her. Kendall is surprised by his statement, but questions how his plan with Ryan displays his feelings for her. She tells him that she does not need his type of caring and demands that he get out her life. Once Zach is gone, Kendall sits down and begins to cry. Seconds later, JR comes rushing in and Kendall rushes into his arms for a hug. She explains to him about Ryan's fake death and JR offers to take care of Ryan for her. After JR leaves, Greenlee comes to see Kendall and immediately tells her that Ryan lied about his death. Kendall tells her what she knows and is even more shocked when Greenlee tells her that Ryan wants another chance. Greenlee says that she wishes Ryan had never returned and did not tell him about the baby. She tells her that she was selfish to want the baby and drag Kendall into her mess. Greenlee tells Kendall that she needs to know if she still wants to give birth to Ryan's child.

Zach goes to his office, where he gets a visit from Julia. Julia updates Zach on the status of the task force and thanks him for caring about her safety, but he claims he does not care. He calls himself a jerk, which makes Julia realize that he is upset about something. Zach pushes Julia to leave him alone, so she does.

Ryan tells Greenlee that he still loves her and the passion they shared that evening was real. Greenlee tells Ryan that she has no idea how she can forgive him for allowing her to endure so much pain. Greenlee hints that Ryan has no idea what he has done or "what he has coming." She does not go into more detail, but instead, explains all of the pain and grief she felt the first few days he supposedly died. Her only hope of getting through it was their child, but then, that was lost too, Greenlee said. She suddenly realizes that Lily was telling the truth the night she saw Ryan at the casino and Zach was in on his plan. Ryan says that Zach gave him money, a car and new identity, but he did not force him to leave Pine Valley. Zach was worried that he would hurt her too, he adds. Ryan thought that taking away her choices, such as his surgery and death, would help her, but he came back when he heard her at Erin's home. He realized that his plan had failed and only made it worse. Greenlee decides that she does not want him anymore because he killed them when he killed himself. Ryan tells her that he will spend the rest of his life trying to make it up to her. She tells him that he has no idea what he put her and Kendall through. When Ryans asks what Kendall has to do with the situation, Greenlee explains that Kendall was her rock when she thought Ryan died and now, if she forgave him, she couldn't because it would be like betraying her best friend. Greenlee grabs her shoes and robe and walks out of the room. Ryan writes a letter, slides it in an envelope for Greenlee, looks at the pictures of them on the bedroom wall and puts the letter on a nightstand. He picks the letter back up and walks out the bedroom door.

JR finds Ryan at the park. He starts ranting about what a horrible person Ryan is for faking his own death. It is not something he should get away with or even live for, JR says. He tries to get Ryan to fight him, but Ryan does not take the bait. Ryan tries to walk away, but JR stops him with a punch to the stomach. When Ryan starts to walk away, JR takes a stick and hits Ryan in the back of the knees.



The Bold and the Beautiful's Matthew Atkinson is back
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